It's odd to say it that way. 'Building a life together', as though what I would've had else-wise would not have been a life. As though Greece would not have been living.
I've always been told my mentality is about 10 years beyond my age. I'm 26 years old. I know I'm not running out of time soon, but my brain doesn't believe it. By all accounts I'm young. Really young. I've got a ton of time...but...not as much as I used to have. It's the kind of age that's a turning point. A sharpening of fuzzy edges in the picture of what your life will become. It's not quite acceptable at this age to not have plans, to not be heading in a particular direction.
My mother called me last night to hash out some family vacation plans for New Year's. We got to talking about her job, and something she said broke my heart. We were discussing bosses, and she told me there are very few good bosses out there. She works as a secretary in my alma mater, and has done so since I was in elementary. There was a time when most of the people she worked with had kids the same age and were going through the same things. Her bosses were her age, and the two school principals became some of her best friends - still to this day. But they each got different jobs over the years. While their group of friends gets together quite often, work hasn't been the same for my mother in years.
The co-workers we all grew up with, the institutions of that school...they're gone or retired or, sadly, passed on. My mom said she's now the old lady on campus, being the oldest person in her building at 52. She was telling me of some of the minor dramas going on at the school right now, and I said 'what ever happened to the good old days'. Her reply is what broke my heart. She said...
I think those are behind me.
That hurts to hear your mother say that. And she didn't mean that she'll have no good days personally. She's got a fantastic social circle, a husband that adores her, a family that loves her, and her career as a classical cellist to continue. But...her day job...the thing she does from 8-5 every day, and has done 8-5 every day for the past 20 years or more. That...she's just waiting to finish. She's just biding her time until she can retire, which is still a few years hence.
So... I made a decision last night on my drive home, that was confirmed in dream later in the evening. I must go to Europe. I must start saving now, because it's going to be painfully expensive, but I must go to Europe. I'm not going to get to 52 and not have seen the things I want to see while I still have time and energy to see them.
What dreams do you have that you might have been putting off? What could you do TODAY to start achieving them? Are there any dreams that you could achieve if you called in sick and gave yourself permission to get one done?
Love and Lyte,